Halloween Health Tips

This Halloween keep your kids on an even keel with these health and nutrition tips:

1. Eat lean proteins such as chicken and complex carbohydrates like brown rice before eating sweets to decrease the associated blood sugar spike. Eating lean protein or complex carbohydrates will help slow down the absorption of the sugar into your blood stream. Did you know that in order for you to lose weight, you must keep your blood sugar level steady to allow your body to burn fat?

2. Offer your children a healthy meal before Trick or Treating. The less hungry they are the less likely they are to overload on candy.

3. During the holiday season keep fresh fruit on the kitchen counter so when your kids grab-n-go they choose fresh fruit over sweets.

4. If candy is a must, offer your children lollipops instead of candy bars. In general, hard candies have fewer calories than chocolate. For example, 2.1 oz of a snickers bar has 280 calories compared to a lollipop with only 22 calories. That means, a snickers bar has over 12x more calories than a piece of a lollipop.

5. Buy your candy at the last minute to avoid eating the candy ahead of time. Consider buying a candy that you don't like to avoid the temptation of eating it
when handing out candy to trick or treaters.

6. After Trick-or-Treating offer to buy the candy your kids gathered for 5 cents a piece, they'll have money to go shopping and you'll have less of a headache from their screaming sugar rush.

7. Donate the candy to a day camp, shelter or school, teachers use one piece at a time for academic reinforcement. One piece at a time is the perfect portion.

Halloween is a time for family and fun. Developing a plan for health ahead of time is the key.

Source: Arnel Ricafranca is the owner of Fitness Boot Camp.

Back To The Dinner Table: Name Your Nights

Getting back on a family dinner schedule is one of the best gifts you can give your children after the holidays. Family dinner has been shown to enhance school success, decrease illegal substance use and decrease bullying and teasing.

Take the time to name each night a different dining experience.

Sunday = Buffet Night

Monday = Hearty Meals Night

Tuesday = Spaghetti Night

Wednesday = On Broadway! As your children prepare and sing a show of any sort. Thursday = Picnic Night – Remember you can picnic anywhere anytime, in your backyard, in the park or even on the family room floor.

Friday = Ethnic Dinner Night, try some exotic food choices or simply stick with Chinese.

Saturday = Date Night, mom and dad go out and kids enjoy Pizza and salad.

Change up your schedule when kids get energized or you run out of recipes. Check out www.cooks.com, www.rachaelray.com, www.allrecipes.com and www.bhg.com for monthly recipes.

ON THE SAME PAGE – WHEN YOUR DISCIPLINE STYLES VARY

Parenting your children can be difficult. We often struggle with determining the right appropriate limits and with following through with the consequences we’ve promised. But, things can really get complicated when we’re two people who have very different styles of discipline try to parent together.

Good Cop, Bad Cop
It’s not unusual for one parent to be far stricter than the other. But, allowing each parent to discipline as they see fit when they know their style is different from that of their spouse sets you up to have your child play one parent against the other. Your child will soon learn to go to the more lenient parent with issues, leaving out the stricter parent. The child may even ask the “nice” parent to intervene on their behalf with the “mean” one. Neither of you is receiving a great deal of respect from your child when this situation is allowed to arise. Plus, it’s likely to cause issues in your marriage, because you never agree on how the other handles discipline situations.

Meeting in the Middle
If your parenting styles differ significantly, you’re going to need to discuss every discipline situation for a while. You should make the rule that no punishments, or even threats of punishment should be delivered by either parent alone. Sit down and discuss each and every situation. You can begin by discussing what each of you would do if you had to deal with the situation alone, and then choose a disciplinary action that both of you can support.

After a while, some patterns will be established, and each of you will have a good idea of how to handle a situation on your own in a way that would be acceptable to your partner, too.

A United Front
It’s critical that you and your partner present a united front to your child. Children need to understand that mom and dad are working together to make the rules and provide clear direction. Showing your child that both parents are on the same page and that standards and consequences are fully supported by both parties will have a positive impact on your child’s behavior. Children look to us to set the rules; inconsistency between parents is confusing to them. So, hook up with your partner and create clear rules and consequences for breaking them that everyone can understand and support.

Free Parenting Class in Phoenix

Parachutes For Parents is a one-stop parenting program that will show you how to both love and discipline your children. It then shows you how to achieve the kind of communication that leads to close, warm connections, joyful laughter, and memorable times with your family. It also shows you how to by-pass the teen rebellion and offers a 125-page Problem-Solving Guide for every imaginable parenting problem.

You will learn to:
• Keep parent-child relationships close & cooperative, rather than broken and bratty
• Conduct open, fun, & interesting conversation, rather than combative or shut down interactions
• Use problems to teach clear lessons about living life honestly & effectively, rather that resist and dismiss them as unnecessary disruptions
• By-pass the teen rebellion, rather than become paralyzed and ineffective during this phase of child development
• Bring true peace & joy to your family, rather than the chaos that fills so many homes.

Powerful Parenting Class
Wednesdays, September 10th - November 12th
CCOJ - Building 3 (Room 303 & 304)
6:30pm - 8:00pm
Class is Free of Charge (no need to register)
Day-care is Free @ Kid's Kountry (on same campus as CCOJ)

Presented by Bobbie Merrill, MSW and Tom Merrill, Ph. D.

Much of the Merrill's approach to working with children is based on Bobbie's highly acclaimed book, Parachutes for Parents: Raising Loved and Loving Children for a Better World. This model has been successfully demonstrated in schools in the United States and Australia, producing high numbers of intellectually and socially gifted and cooperative children. In addition, thousands of parents have reported significant results when they use this model.

Joy is located on the NW corner of 75th Ave. and Loop 101. 21000 N. 75th Ave., Glendale, AZ 85308

Is Your Child Ready For Potty Training

Most children show an interest in learning to potty between the ages of 18-36months. Yet every child is different. If you ask your friends, you'll hear every story under the sun from, "My daughter trained herself at 22 months," to "My five year old still won't poop on the potty."

As a parent you want to remain calm and know that your developmentally skillful child will surely be using the potty by elementary school so don't freak out:). One thing I wish someone had told me before I introduced the potty to our children was that many children pee train before they poop train. No challenge, it will all come in time. Breathe, relax.

Let's begin with signs you child might be ready.

Cognitive Signs

Can follow simple instructions, such as "go get the toy."
Understands the value of putting things where they belong.
Has words for pee and poop.
Has awareness that pee or poop are coming out.
Feels the urge to pee or poop.
Can communicate that urge.

Behavioral Signs

Shows interest in other people using the potty.
Wants to look at or watch people going potty.
Gives a verbal noiuse or sign that she is pottying such as grunting, squatting, or telling you.
Demonstrates a desire for independence.
Takes pride in her accomplishments.
Seems eager to use the potty.

Physical Signs

Can sit down quietly in one position for two to five minutes.
Can pull his pants up and down.
Does not like the feeling of wearing a wet or dirty diaper.
Wants the dirty diaper to come off.
Takes the dirty diaper off himself.
Can walk and run with relative ease.
Can hold her pee for three-four hours or more (this shows bladder control)
Has regular, well-formed bowel movements at relatively predictable times.

Next we'll take a look at introducing pottying to your "potty-ready" child.

Art Masterpiece Program

Art is a medium for all the senses. A child can look, imagine, think, ponder, draw, paint, sculpt, explore and learn with art. If you have some time in September consider attending the Art Masterpiece Program at the Phoenix Art Museum for educators. Parents are welcome as well. Specifically, it is training for those parents whose schools participate in Art Masterpiece. But really, any parent can come learn and enjoy.

Art Masterpiece Program

The Art Masterpiece Program trains school-based volunteers in tools and techniques to teach elementary-level students about the visual arts. Most participants are classroom volunteers at a child’s school who augment presentation of the visual arts on a regular basis. The Training Program covers basics of looking at and discussing art objects, an overview of art history, resources for materials and ideas, modeling of classroom presentations and activities, and Museum orientation.

Wednesdays in September*

September 3, 10, 17, 24
9:30am – 12 Noon
Phoenix Art Museum

* New material will be presented every Wednesday

You can register online today or at the Museum on Wednesday, September 3 @ 9am
Cost: $20 for entire program/$10 Training Manual.
Want the Training Manual for FREE?

Here is the link:

http://www.phxart.org/events/documents/2008ArtMasterpieceManual_001.pdf

If you wish to bring art into your home on your own here are some helpful resources:

Discovering Great Artists: Hands-On Art for Children in the Styles of the Great Masters (Bright Ideas for Learning) by MaryAnn F. Kohl and Kim Solga

Dynamic Art Projects for Children: Includes Step-By-Step Instructions and Photographs by Denise M. Logan (Spiral-bound - Sep 2005)

How to Teach Art to Children, Grades 1-6 by Joy Evans and Tanya Skelton

The Art of Teaching Art to Children: In School and at Home by Nancy Beal and Gloria Bley Miller

Text Messaging May Contribute To Decrease in Writing Skills

According to Dr. Cindy Bunin Nurik, a study released by researchers from the Irish State Examination Commission on April 25 revealed that text messaging was directly related to a decline in writing ability.

1) Encourage creative writing ten minutes a day.
2) Create Make-A-Stories with your children, you write a sentence then they add a sentence in writing or even verbally at the dinner table.
3) Incorporate art to your writing. Give your children writing and art journals like Art Escapes by Dory Kanter, to encourage writing and drawing for fun.
4) Encourage writing letters instead of always texting.
5) Texting is habit forming because it is "immediately reinforcing." Talk with your kids about negative habits and encourage them to feed their brains with knowledge and experience by not becoming a texting junkie.
6) Get art and writing books for your youngsters as well like Kids Art Works!: Creating With Color, Design, Texture & More by Sandi Henry & Art for Kids: Drawing: The Only Drawing Book You'll Ever Need to Be the Artist You've Always Wanted to Be by Kathryn Temple

Write, draw, paint, tell stories, elaborate and communicate with your kids. They'll love you for it.

GEORGIA COOKING IN AN OKLAHOMA KITCHEN

A few of you moms have said, "Lynne we can't do organic and low sugar all the time, we need to break loose sometimes." Agreed!

If you're gonna get loose, do it with Trisha Yearwood's decadent GEORGIA COOKING IN AN OKLAHOMA KITCHEN. She even has his and hers variations! That will do a marriage good.

Here's a sample for the upcoming holiday season.

Green Punch - Serve this punch with Cheese Straws. It’s a Yearwood family tradition - Perfect to serve at Christmas parties because it’s a beautiful bright green and makes a pretty punch bowl.

Ingredients:
 2 13-ounce packets unsweetened lemon-lime soft drink mix, such as Kool-Aid,
2 cups sugar,
1 46-ounce can pineapple juice,
12 ounces frozen lemonade concentrate thawed, 32 ounces (1 quart) ginger ale. 
Put 2 quarts of water in a 1-gallon container. Add the drink mix and sugar and stir until the sugar is dissolved. Add the pineapple juice and lemonade concentrate and stir well. Just before serving, add the ginger ale. www.trishayearwood.com.

Introducing solid foods to baby

Nature made breast milk a complete nutritional package for baby until about around age one, when supplemental foods benefit growth and development. Depending on babies height and weight she may need more calories as early as four months, for growth, that’s when supplementing with rice cereal may begin.

The amount of milk baby is drinking has increased by this age to about 32 ounces per day. Her tummy may be full but she may be hungry because her body is growing and she needs more calories. At this point you may introduce a bit of rice cereal at dinner time. Every baby has different needs, talk with your pediatrician about introducing solids to your child.

Often by five-six months of age baby is ready to explore foods and textures. Offering yogurt on a tiny spoon for baby to eat and explore in a soft beginning. You can also turn organic peas, potatoes, squash and green beans your family eats for dinner into finely processed food for baby to suck off a spoon. Visit www.chow-baby.com to learn more about organic foods and purees.

Doctors often recommend serving one strained vegetable at a time for several days so that any reactions can be noted and addressed.

For more information on preparing natural food for baby you can read about organic baby food at www.earthsbest.com or check out Simply Natural Baby Food: Easy Recipes for Delicious Meals Your Infant and Toddler Will Love by Cathe Olson at your local library or book store.

Signs it is time to talk with your pediatrician about introducing solid foods.

* Head control. Your baby can hold his head steady in an upright position.
* Baby stops using his tongue to push food out of his mouth.
* Baby sits while supported.
* Baby can move food back and forth in his mouth, then swallow.
* Most babies are ready to eat solids when they've doubled their birth weight (or weigh about 15 pounds) and are at least 4 months old.
* He seems hungry, even after gulping his milk.
* Baby shows curiosity about what you're eating.

How To Create The Space Between

Create a space between you where you listen, reflect, hear, and respond with warmth.
This space is where you build the relationship so do not rush to solve, shame or ridicule, be reflective, talk slowly and take this opportunity to listen carefully to your child.
The space between is where you take the time to get to now your child better.
The space between is where you can express empathy “You are having so much fun on the scooter, you prefer not to give someone else a turn. “It’s hard to go to school when you are worried the kids will tease you.” “Sometimes you wish your dad would spend special time just with you.”
The space between is where your relationship grows as you show love, affection, patience, caring and empathy.

The Dinner Table and Your Hoola Hoop

One Family’s Experience

I was with a family recently who felt that their every day life was unmanageable.

After establishing their family mission, values and rules, we went to work on establishing their routines.

Dinnertime felt most disconcerting so we started there.

The parents explained that though their children were now in elementary school they had never been able to get the kids to sit down for dinner. Dinner-time felt chaotic. The kids complained about what the mother cooked, they got up from the table several times and then ran off to their rooms after dinner.

This family needed to get the parents back in charge of dinner. The parents are to indicate when dinner begins and ends. The parents identify who has to help with after-dinner clean-up and who can go outside to play or to their rooms to finish their homework.

1. In order to clarify the routine, first we wrote down what the dinner routine looked like and we hung it in the kitchen.

1. Set the table.
2. Place the food on the table.
3. Sit down to dinner
4. Ring the dinner bell to mark the start of the meal.
5. Say an observance of gratitude.
6. Eat.
7. Talk about our day.
8. Ring the bell to signal the end of the meal.

2. We marked each child’s eating space and told them once they sat down they would not leave that space without parental consent.

We all sat down to eat, we placed hoola-hoops under the chairs of the children to mark their “eating space.” They were told that once the family sat down to eat, the children were not to leave their eating spaces until they had asked permission and it had been granted by their parents.

3. We required the children to ask for consent to leave the table.

Dinner was done, they asked for permission, “Mom or dad, may I leave the table?” The mom and dad said, “Yes you may,” the children took their plates to the sink, and to the parents’ surprise they went into the living room for family activities.

The parents just looked to me like, “What, our kids have never sat through a family meal!”

For the next hour, we played activities, we built some towers, we did a family drawing, and then it was time for a bath, reading, and sleep.

Now, this was a family who understood what a dinner-routine looks like. There were clear expectations about what dinner would be like. There was an order to the dinner routine, there was a clear beginning and an end. Then, there were family activities after dinner.

Your children hunger for their routine, they need to know their routine, they need to know what’s next because it helps them with mastery. They also hunger for you, even a recalcitrant teen will do activities with a parent if the activities appeal to the teen.

Why is protein consumption so important?

Proteins are the building blocks for the cells in our bodies. There are many reasons why proteins are important to consume one reason is that protein contains essential amino acids.

Proteins are large molecules made up of smaller chemicals called amino acids. Humans need 20 different amino acids in order to produce all the proteins in our bodies. We can synthesize 10 of the amino acids, but the other 10 either cannot be made or not made in a sufficient quantity to be of any use. These 10 “essential” amino acids which must be obtained from food are: threonine, lysine, methionine, arginine, valine, phenylalanine, leucine, tryptophan, isoleucine and histidine. The 10 we can make are glycine, alanine, serine, cysteine, aspartic acid, glutamic acid, asparagine, glutamine, tyrosine and proline. (Source: thedietchannel.com)

Protein is such an important part of our bodies that it pays to take it seriously. We need the right amount and the correct kinds of protein to function at our best. A balanced diet will meet all our protein needs.

In order to determine your daily protein requirement as an adult multiply your weight by .55 to learn the number of grams of protein you need to eat daily.

Use these calculations to learn how much protein your children need to eat daily. Don't forget the healthy fats (nuts, avocado, milk, cheese, meats) and complex carbohydrates (beans, legumes, cereals, pasta, sprouted breads) in your diet, these are very important as well.

Ages 1 to 3 - 0.81 grams (child's weight in pounds x 0.81 = daily grams of protein)
Ages 4 to 6 - 0.68 grams
Ages 7 to 10 - 0.55 grams

Back To School: Who's doing what?

School starts tomorrow! We've organized our school supplies, layed out tomorrow's outfit and made a yummy lunch. I was interested in what everyone else is up to...

ABC 15 News in Phoenix reports:

"The best thing parents can do is get their own homework done well before summer vacation winds down," said Angie Hicks, founder of Angie’s List. "Many providers are already getting booked up; get in now to get the best service and to have time for any last-minute emergencies."

Angie’s List recently polled its members nationwide about their back to school plans. Here's their list:

Going to the pediatrician: About two-thirds of school age children will head to the doctor before the school year begins. North Scottsdale Pediatrics is at 480-860-8488.

Before and after school care: Consider The Boys and Girls Club.

Hiring a tutor: More than one-in-four-kids have used a tutor in the past and another one-in-three might require one this year. Call the best! Dana Herzberg @ On Track Tutoring Tutoring 480-563-5588.

Getting pictures taken: School pictures matter to families. Most schools schedule their photo day early in the school year. How about getting a family photo!

Taking music lessons: 40 percent of Angie’s List members said their child or children will take up music this year.

Getting your computer up to speed: The majority of poll respondents will not be buying a new computer this school year.

School uniforms: Nearly one-quarter of Angie’s List respondents say their child is required to wear a uniform to school.

Taking driving lessons: Will you have a student driver in the household this year? Car crashes are the leading cause of death among teens. Make a donation to www.lisajohnsonfoundation.org and learn what you can do to keep your teen safe!

Time for a haircut: Your child wants to make a good first impression at school, so make sure they are a cut above with a great hair cut.

I cut my own kids hair this year and we used the money we saved to go to the Waterpark!

Happy First Day of School To You!

Peggy Porter Brings Success Home

If you are looking for coaching and guidance to get your Mom-Made Career soaring, consider joining Peggy Porter's SUCCESS CLUB For Mom Entrepreneurs. I love her wisdom. Visit www.peggyporter.com for more information.

Here is some of her current sage advice.

Awareness-being focused on the power of the present and how perfect it really is. Perfecting the present means, right now you are at a turning point between the past and the future. This turning point is perfect. It is perfect because it is a moment of choice for you. It is an opportunity to change the course of your life, whatever that may be. The present is all we have at this moment, so that in itself is perfect.

If you are fixated on the past or worrying about the future, you will be completely missing the perfection of the present. The inability to be mindful of what you are doing gives opportunity for anxiety, worry and fear to sneak into your life. If the majority of your day is worry or fear based, chances are your thoughts are somewhere else and not in the present.

Ask yourself now, "What part of my life am I living in-past, present or future?" It is the present, remember, that holds all the power.

So how do you start living and enjoying more of the present?

First, stop multi-tasking!! I know for busy women this is easier said than done. We have such huge demands that multi-tasking seems essential in order to get our to-do list complete. The problem, however, is that when we multi-task our energy is split and we are often less focused and more scattered. We do things without remembering and feel the stress of the mental to-do list we are constantly checking off in our heads.

When you feel the urge or catch yourself gearing up for the next round of multi-tasking, stop yourself. Remember that even though you may feel more efficient, the process of multi-tasking exhausts you mentally and physically while robbing you of the joy of the present moment. Keep in mind my formula:

SE(Split Energy)=Reduction and FE(Focused Energy)=Production

Continue to ask yourself, where is my attention focused?

Limiting Sugar in Your Kid's Diets: Eat Dinner For Breakfast

Parents who wish to limit sugar in their children's diets are looking for foods higher in protein and healthy fats for breakfast. If you lose the sugary cereals and pancakes five days a week, what else can you offer?

One morning, you may creatively offer left overs from dinner for breakfast, you might be surprised when chicken teriyaki appeals to your four year old. Here are some refreshing options you might try for breakfast in your home along with two delicious recipes from EatWellBeWell.org.

• Roast turkey and cheese roll-ups
• Chicken Stir-Fry
• Powerhouse Pizza
• Chicken Satay
• Vegetable Quesadilla
• Grilled Chicken Tacos
• Sloppy Chicken Joes
• Tuna salad in “scoops” tortilla chips
• Greek pasta with tomatoes and white beans
• Soft tacos with organic beef
• Pasta with pesto shredded zucchini and carrots
• Tortilla Soup
• Crustless Spinach Quiche

Sloppy Garden Joes

Ingredients:
1 onion, chopped
1 carrot, chopped
1/2 green pepper, chopped
1 pound extra lean ground turkey or chicken
1- 8 ounce can no salt tomato sauce
1 -15 ounce can whole tomatoes, crushed
1-8 ounce can mushrooms
1/4 cup barbecue sauce
pepper to taste
8 whole wheat buns

Directions:
1. Sauté onions, carrot, green pepper, and ground turkey or chicken in a pan over medium-high heat for 5 minutes.
2. Add tomato sauce, crushed tomatoes, mushrooms, barbecue sauce, and pepper, and bring to a boil.
3. Reduce heat and simmer covered for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally.
4. Uncover and cook for an additional 3 minutes or until thick.
5. Serve on toasted or plain buns.

Powerhouse Pizza

Ingredients:
12-inch unbaked pizza crust, homemade or store-bought
3/4 cup pizza sauce
1 cup grated low fat mozzarella cheese
1 1/2 cups sliced mushrooms
1 medium zucchini, thinly sliced lengthwise or on the diagonal
1/2 cup roasted red peppers, roughly chopped
1/2 cup thinly sliced sweet onions
2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese

Directions:
1. Preheat oven to 400» F.
2. Place pizza crust on a baking sheet and bake for 10 minutes in the preheated oven.
3. Spread the pizza sauce over the crust.
4. Scatter the mozzarella cheese over the sauce.
5. Top with sliced mushrooms, zucchini, red peppers, and onion.
6. Sprinkle Parmesan cheese on top.
7. Bake for 20 minutes or until the crust is nice and brown and the center bubbly.
8. Serve warm.

Research shows that children who eat healthy foods for breakfast concentrate better in school and experience less variability in their daily moods. Here are some sites to help you in your quest.

www.eatwellbewell.org/
www.mypyramid.gov/
www.nutritiondata.com/
www.calorieking.com/
www.allrecipes.com/

The Family Coach Workshop: Managing Anger and Anxiety in Children

Saturday August 16, 2008 9-10:15 am
Saturday October 4, 2008 9-10:15 am

Research suggests children experience frustration, anger, and anxiety from ages 3-12 with more frequency than in the past. Why might that be so and what can families do to help children feel calm and secure. We’ll earn about cavemen and thinkers then develop cognitive and sensory interventions to bring home with The Family Coach Dr. Lynne Kenney. Cost: $50.00 per couple, 30 participant limit. Sign-up at 480-860-8488 x 9 x 1. North Office.

a. The biology of anger and anxiety
b. Using our thinkers to manage our cavemen
c. How exercise and nutrition make a difference
d. Cognitive strategies for calmer kids
e. Sensory tools and equipment
e. Preparation, planning and prevention in your home

Think Positive

Practice Positive Thinking

Research shows that your viewpoint and perspective affect your health. People who think positively live more healthful and happy lives.

You can shift your thoughts, first take inventory. What kind of thinker are you?

Keep a journal of your thoughts for 72 hours and reflect on whether your thoughts benefit your well-being or distract from your health. Carry the journal in your pocket, when you drop your children off at school, order lunch, or interact with a colleague, write down what you are thinking on the left side of the page and how you are feeling on the right. In the following 72 hours do the same activity but make a third column for thought replacement, write down alternate positive thoughts to replace your negative thoughts.

When you are late for an appointment and think, "This darn traffic." Replace the thought with "It's so nice to have some peace and quiet in the car for a few minutes."

When your children won't listen and you are thinking, "I am so tired of these squirts." Replace the thought with "I am raising such independent thinkers."

Come on, don't laugh just do it!

Summer Dinner Time is Family Time

Summer is in full swing. Swimming, tennis, playdates, we're all so busy. The evenings are longer, the sun is brighter. What better time to get back to the family dinner table than tonight! Hey forget the table, it's summer, eat together where ever you are...

Family dinner around the table, at the soccer field or on the tailgate of your car is an important family ritual. Dinnertime is the perfect opportunity to relax, connect and talk about your day. It’s a non-threatening environment that can really help your kids open up to you and tell you what’s going on in their lives. Try to make the atmosphere low key and enjoyable – and make a rule that no one leaves the table until everyone has finished eating. If conversation seems stymied, talk about your own day, or ask some questions to get your kids talking.

What was the funnest part of your day today?
What did you and Annie do this morning?
What movie shall we see as a family this week?
What shall we play after dinner? Running bases or Hearts?

Dinnertime is your chance to get to know one another, learn about your likes and dislikes and create lifelong memories. So eat up and dive in!

The Family Meeting

Family meetings can be a valuable way to make family decisions, communicate information and discuss issues. Many families have never had a meeting, and aren’t really sure how to use this forum with their families. Your family meeting is the time to share opinions, reflect on current events, talk about life experiences, plan for the future and solve challenges. They can be structured or unstructured, just make sure that everyone has a say in how the meeting will be conducted. One family I know begins with an agenda, another passes around the "talking stick" so one person speaks at a time.

Here are some tips to get you started with your family meeting.

• They need not be a formal affair– Family meetings don’t require a lot of pomp and circumstance, just that everyone is present and tuned into the matter at hand. They can be held during dinner if that’s what’s most convenient.

• Use this time to praise in front of everyone– Offer congratulations for accomplishments at family meetings. Let everyone have the chance to recognize other family members.

• Keep it positive - Sometimes family meetings will have to address negative issues, but if you keep the tone of the meetings positive overall, they’re more likely to be viewed as helpful by your family.

• Family meetings are not group punishment – If your children are driving you nuts, busting their collective chops in a family meeting is not the answer. You don’t want your kids to dread family meetings. This is also not the time to single out a child for something they’ve done wrong. Do that in private.

• Family meetings are not for “laying down the law”, either – Successful family meetings involve everyone providing their opinion and input. Go around the table and ask for an opinion if someone’s not speaking up. If you plan to dictate change with no input from anyone else, use another venue.

• Do something fun once in a while – Throw in a surprise now and then. Why not have your family meeting at the bowling alley or the go kart track? Even playing a game at home at the end of the meeting can be a nice change.

• End on a happy note – Even if you’ve had to deliver bad news at this meeting, find something positive to end with. It will leave a better memory about the experience.

• Don’t have them too often – You don’t need to have a family meeting to discuss every little issue. They’ll carry more weight if you use them only for important issues.

Allowance Strategies

This morning my daughter said, "Mom I need my $20." She's seven. So I'm thinking how did we go from $2 to $20? Was I on vacation while this happened?

Deciding on whether to give an allowance, and how much to give can be tricky.

1. First, decide what items your child will have to use allowance for. Will he have to pay for his activities, like attending a movie with friends, buying non-necessary household items, clothing and gifts? Or is it just spending money? (Really, how many more Webkins do we need?)

2. Once you’ve determined the spending guidelines, it will help you determine a proper amount. Be careful of giving a large allowance without requiring any effort on your child’s part. Learning the value of hard earned money is a worthwhile lesson.

3. In addition, I’m a firm believer that kids shouldn’t be paid to do things like clean their rooms, because it’s important to for them to learn that they can, and should, take care of their things and contribute to our household.

4. Be clear on how much allowance they’ll receive, spending restrictions, and any requirements that are tied to receiving it.

5. Remember intrinsic motivation is more powerful than extrinsic motivation so think of remuneration in terms of time spent together, shared activities and love not just in terms of dollars.

Gotta go find my wallet.

Mommy Meditation

It’s likely that the last thing you feel able to do in your busy, busy day is set aside time to meditate. The benefits of meditation are endless. The role this ritual plays within parenthood is essential. Meditation can allow you to create exceptional inner peace, help you develop more confident parenting skills and bring your life order despite your feelings of complete disarray.

Meditation allows you to clear away your path for the day.

How To Make Meditation Happen:

1. In order to bring this peace to your morning, wake up slightly earlier than usual and begin the day with a sense of calm rather than rushing from one activity from sunrise to sunset.

2. To establish the habit of nurturing your spirit before bed after the kids have already been put down for sleep, leave those dishes for the morning and nurture yourself not the housework.

3. Set aside five minutes during the day, in the car while you wait for your children after school, at your desk or while waiting for others in a meeting or at lunch.

Now I Made Time What Do I Do?

A Few Simple Steps

1. Dim the lights and sit comfortably on your floor. You can use a pillow to sit on to aide your comfort and allow your spine to extend fully as you sit upright. Or, you may prefer to lie flat, with your arms resting to your side.

2. Focus on your breathing. Enjoy the feeling that is created as you slowly inhale and exhale slowly releasing the air and tension from your body.

3. Feel your chest expand and collapse, feel your shoulders drop and neck muscles loosen.

4. Let your mind focus on your breathing let all your thoughts fly into the sky.

It's really pretty simple, breathe relax and let go. How's that for Mommy Meditation.

The value of meditation is endless. Find the time. Your mind and body deserve it.

The Extended Family Dinner

Research shows that sitting down to dinner is an important protective factor in maintaining the health and well-being of your children. Establishing a set dinner time is the first step. Engaging your children in activities that extend the dinner hour is the second step.

Children love doing homework with you at the dinner table, they love playing card games, testing themselves at math facts and bringing new, sometimes even made-up vocabulary words to the table. Take your time, talk, laugh and talk for hours.

After dinner extend the fun by labeling each night a different family activity.

Monday Night is Discovery Night

Bring the "Discovery Box" to the dinner table. Place unique, familiar or fascinating objects in a box and allow each child to pull an object and talk about it. After dinner go on-line or take a trip to your local library to learn more about topics related to the things in your discovery box.


Tuesday Night is Reading Night

Prepare early readers, by bringing everyday objects to the table that have words or print on them, such as cereal boxes and other items in your cupboard. Play reading and guessing games using the printed materials. Play games with the words, making silly sentences, tongue twisters and fun stories.

Wednesday Night "You are a STAR"

Play find your "Star Word." Assign one word to each child. That is the word that makes them A STAR at this meal. Frequently occurring words such as "The, and, it, him, her, she, he" are good beginning words. Then have each child bring a book to the table, choose a page, and name how many times their STAR word appears. That number becomes the child's "Magic Number" for the night and every time he encounters that number for the rest of the evening he gets to make a wish or discuss his current life dreams and aspirations.

Thursday Night it's Show and Tell

Play show and tell at your family table. Have your children bring an object, a piece of art, a song or something to share. Shine the "spot-light" on one child at a time and allow only him or her to share.

Friday Night is Family History Night

Bring family photos, heirlooms or pieces of family history to the table and talk about your family ancestry and historical family member's life experiences.

Saturday Night is Game Night

Play board games, cards, chess or checkers at the table after dinner to enhance your family experience.

Sunday Night You're on Broadway!

Put on a show, dance, sing, do a skit Laugh and "lift each other up" with genuine compliments, enthusiasm and joy.

You will enhance family relationships and help your children develop self-esteem when you extend your family dinner with family fun!

Sensory Kids: Teach Calm

What is a sensory diet?

A sensory diet is a series of activities designed to help children manage sensory input better. Many children lack the ability to modulate their energy and behavior when they are overstimulated with sensory input, sound, sight, touch, noise and highly stimulating people or environments. It’s as though every child has an outer sieve, for some children the holes are big and sensory input floods them. When this happens we need to help the child re-organize the brain by stream-lining the sensory input.

Have a sensory kit handy with a hair brush for back brushing, a blanket for gentle wrapping and rocking (blanket is always placed across chest not over face so child can breathe), soft music, nature sounds, sand tray, water table, sensory weighted-vest etc http://www.therapyshoppe.com/ so that the child can choose a calming activity. Use your sensory kit before child gets stuck on energy mountain, cause it can be hard to re-contain the child once he is so disorganized.

Imagine that a child climbs an energy mountain throughout the day. Many children can walk down the mountain without letting their energy become uncontrolled. Some children hang at the top of energy mountain, feeling frazzled, silly, angry, agitated or anxious. Help your child “Climb down energy mountain” by drawing a large mountain on a large sheet of white paper or poster board.

Talk with your child about activities we do at different stages of the mountain. Let your child draw activities on different levels of energy mountain. Use different colors to denote different levels of energy. Calm = blue, Having fun = yellow, Getting excited = Orange Over the top = Red. Have your child mark where he is on energy mountain several times a day, you do it as well!

At the base we feel calm, we play quietly, we talk quietly and we are at peace. Up the mountain a bit we get excited, we play games, we play with friends, we play at the playground or at the swimming pool. Toward the top of energy mountain we are getting extremely silly, unresponsive, uncontrollable, angry or annoyed, it’s time to “Climb down energy mountain.” Have your child mark where he is on energy mountain several times a day, you do it as well!

Use your water table, sensory kit, sand tray and outdoor activities to help your child re-set his energy. Labeling “I’m climbing too high on energy mountain” “I need a peaceful moment” “Will you scratch my back” “Let’s have a Mommy meditation moment,” a sensory kit, and planned physical activities throughout the day will help your child modulate his energy better. It will help you stay calm as well. Sometimes a calm movie or soft music and a moment to lay on a soft body pillow will do the trick.

Peaceful moments to you!

Sensory Resources

Boy and a Bear: The Children's Relaxation Book
Lori Lite, Meg Hartigan (Illustrator), Meg Hartigan (Illustrator), M. Hartigan (Illustrator), M. Hartigan
Cool Cats, Calm Kids: Relaxation and Stress Management for Young People
Mary L. Williams, Dianne O. Burke (Illustrator)
The Highly Sensitive Child: Helping Our Children Thrive When the World Overwhelms Them
Elaine N. Aron, Elaine N. Aron
Raising Your Spirited Child: A Guide for Parents Whose Child Is More Intense, Sensitive, Perceptive, Persistent, and Energetic
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka
Sensational Kids: Hope and Help For Children With Sensory Processing Disorder
Lucy Jane Miller, Doris A. Fuller, Doris A. Fuller
Sensory Connection: An OT and SLP Team Approach
Nancy Kashman, Janet Mora
Batter Up Kids Sensational Snacks: Healthy Eats from the Premier Children's Cooking School
Barbara Beery, Marty Snortum (Illustrator)

The Mailbox Yearbook: A Summer tool you do not want to live without

The Mailbox is the most popular teacher's idea reference resource.

You can order the magazine throughout the year or do as I do and buy the annual Year Books. They are full of beautiful activity ideas, planning sheets and worksheets for preschool-elementary aged children.

If you think you aren't "crafty" or "creative" these year books will change your life. They many sections of learning, math, science, reading, language, arts, music etc. When was the last time you made a water rocket or put on a George Washington play.

I could not live without them in the SummerTime, we play, make, create and learn as a familly all Summer long.

Just look for The Mailbox Year Books in the Shop at www.theeducationcenter.com (it's on the red toolbar). Tell your friends, they'll love you for it.

Spirit Menders

Children are born with an incredible spirit. Everything is new, fascinating and thought provoking. As parents, it should be our goal to keep this spirit alive and fresh for as long as possible. Unfortunately, we often unwittingly do things that squash the spirit in our children. Here are some common spirit breakers and some spirit menders. See if you’re guilty of doing things that can break the spirit. Then try some of these spirit menders to help get you back on track.

Spirit Breakers

• Squashing Dreams – Your little boy tells you that when he grows up he wants to be an astronaut and fly to outer space. Trying to instill some reason in him, you inform him of how difficult it is to be an astronaut; how smart he’ll have to be, how much education it requires, etc.

• Belittling Talent – Your daughter is great at soccer, but her grades are not as good as you’d like them to be. When she acts proud of scoring the winning goal, you say, “it would be far more impressive if you got an A in math”.

• Humiliation – Parents sometimes resort to embarrassing their child in order to get them to change behavior. “See, son, little Johnny doesn’t have accidents in his pants, and he’s your age.” Not only is this tactic ineffective; it breaks the spirit.

• Brushing off what your child thinks is fascinating – Children have a tendency to get somewhat obsessed with things. Maybe it annoys you that your son spends hours watching the stars through his telescope. However, if you give him the impression that being fascinated with the stars is silly, he may become ashamed of his interests and be afraid to pursue the things that really matter to him.

Spirit Menders

• Having a curious mind – If you show interest in how things work, and share this interest with your child, you fuel their natural curiosity and interest.

• Being involved in what they like – Your children have activities that bring them joy, join in those activities with them! Get off the couch and participate!

• Show that you’re proud – Be proud of whatever they accomplish – and let them know it. You can never love them too much and you can never tell them too many times that you’re proud of their accomplishments.

• Listen to them - Your children have fascinating original voices listen to their likes, dislikes, stories and experiences.

Take a deep breath and begin to be present, loving and compassionate today. It's not too late to mend your child's spirit.

Tips on Separation Anxiety from Kid's Health

Unfortunately, teary and tantrum-filled goodbyes are a very common part of a child's earliest years. Around the first birthday, it is common for kids to develop separation anxiety, getting upset when a parent tries to leave them with someone else. Though separation anxiety is a perfectly normal part of childhood development, it can be unsettling. Understanding what your child is going through and having a few coping strategies in mind can go a long way toward helping both of you get through it.

How Separation Anxiety Develops

When your baby was first born, you likely noticed that he or she adapted pretty well to other caregivers. This is typical for most infants. You probably felt more anxiety about being separated than your child did when you first left him or her with a relative, babysitter, or a day care provider! As long as their needs are being met, babies younger than 6 months typically adjust well to other people.

Sometime between 4-7 months, a baby typically develops a sense of object permanence, and begins to learn that things and people exist even when they're out of sight. This is when babies typically start to play the "dropsy" game, when they drop things over the side of the high chair, look for them, and expect the adult to retrieve what they've dropped (which, once retrieved, get dropped again!).

The same thing occurs with their parents. Babies realize that there's only one of you, and when he or she can't see you, that means you've gone away. However, at this point, your child doesn't yet understand the concept of time and doesn't know if or when you'll come back. So whether you're in the kitchen, in the next bedroom, or at the office, it's all the same to your toddler. You've disappeared. Your child will do whatever he or she can to prevent this from happening.

Between 8 months old 1 year old, your child is growing into a more independent toddler - yet he or she is even more uncertain about being separated from you. This is when separation anxiety typically develops, and your child may become agitated and upset whenever you try to leave him or her. Whether you need to go into the next room for just a few seconds, leave your child with a sitter for the evening, or drop off your child at day care, you may find that your child cries, clings to you, and resists attention from others.

The timing of separation anxiety can vary widely from child to child. Some kids may experience it later, between 18 months and 2-1/2 years of age. Some may never experience it. And for others, there are certain life stresses that can trigger feelings of anxiety about being separated from a parent: a new child care situation or caregiver, a new sibling, moving to a new place, or tension at home.

How long does separation anxiety last? It varies from child to child. And it also depends on the child and how the parent responds. In some cases, depending on a child's temperament, separation anxiety can be persistent from infancy and last through the elementary school years. In cases where the separation anxiety interferes with an older child's normal activities, it can be the sign of a deeper anxiety disorder. In cases where the separation anxiety appears out of the blue in an older child, it can be an indication of another problem that the child may be dealing with, like bullying or abuse.

Keep in mind that separation anxiety is usually different from the normal feelings an older child has when he or she doesn't want a parent to leave. In those cases, the distress can usually be overcome if the child is distracted enough, and those feelings will not re-emerge until the parent returns and the child remembers that the parent left.

And your child does understand the effect his or her behavior has on you. If you come running back into the room every time your child cries and then stay with your child longer or cancel your plans completely, your child will continue to use this strategy to avoid separation.

What You May Be Feeling

During this stage, you're likely to experience a host of different emotions. It may be gratifying to feel that your child is finally as attached to you as you are to him or her. At the same time, you're likely to feel guilty about taking time out for yourself, leaving your child with a caregiver, or going to work. And you may start to feel overwhelmed by the amount of attention your child seems to need from you.

Try to keep in mind that your child's unwillingness to leave you is a good sign that healthy attachments have developed between the two of you. Eventually your child will be able to remember that you always return after you leave, and these memories will be enough to comfort him or her while you are gone. This also gives your child a chance to develop his or her own coping skills and a little independence.

Making Goodbyes Easier

There are a number of strategies you can use to help ease your child (and yourself) through this difficult period.

* Timing is everything. Try not to start day care or child care with an unfamiliar person between the ages of 8 months and 1 year, when separation anxiety is first likely to present itself. Also, try not to leave your child when he or she is likely to be tired, hungry, or restless. If at all possible, schedule your departures for after naps and mealtimes.
* Practice. Practice being apart from each other, and introduce new people and places gradually. If you're planning to leave your child with a relative or a new babysitter, then invite that person over in advance so they can spend time together while you're in the room. If your child is starting at a new day care center or preschool, make a few visits there together before a full-time schedule begins. Practice leaving your child with a caregiver for short periods of time so that he or she can get used to being away from you.
* Be calm and consistent. Create a goodbye ritual during which you say a pleasant, loving, and firm goodbye. Stay calm and show confidence in your child. Reassure him or her that you'll be back - and explain how long it will be until you return using concepts your child will understand (such as after lunch) because your child can't yet understand time. Give him or her your full attention when you say goodbye, and when you say you're leaving, mean it; coming back will only make things worse.
* Follow through on promises. It's important to make sure that you return when you have promised to return. This is critical, and there can be no exceptions. This is the only way your child will develop the confidence that he or she can make it through this time.

Kids with separation anxiety disorder fear being lost from their family members and are often convinced that something bad will happen when they're apart. It's a good idea to talk with your child's doctor if your child is showing signs of this, which include:

* panic symptoms (such as nausea, vomiting, or shortness of breath) or panic attacks before a parent leaves
* nightmares about separation
* fear of sleeping alone
* excessive worry about being lost or kidnapped or going places without a parent

For most kids, the anxiety of being separated from a parent passes without any need for medical attention. But if you have concerns, talk to your child's doctor.

Updated and reviewed by: Michael J. Harkness, MD www.kidshealth.com

What shall we do today - Activity Board

Help your children to learn daily rhythm and routines with activity boards. Two that we love to post for My Very Own School are the "What shall we do today board" and "The daily schedule". When your children have an image of the order of their daily activities they experience mastery and growing independence.

Your children will delight in telling you "What's Next" in their day.

Search www.lakeshorelearning.com and see what boards are best for your family. Get organized with graphics and help your children thrive.

Teach your 2, 3 and 4 year olds the rhythm and routine of school this summer!

The summer is a great time to practice the rhythm and routine of school in your home with your children. By 18-24 months children are ready to learn rhythms and routines. Make your family a My Very Own School Schedule two or three days a week and implement story time, outdoor play time and group activity time. Wait until you see how well your home runs when there is some order and routine. Not only will your children love it but you will too!

Here are some of the typical school experiences you can experiment with in your own home. Research online, talk with your fiends and go visit a preschool. For more ideas also go to www.mailbox.com, the very best resource for early childhood teachers and You! You can buy their annual activity book for a years worth of excellent activities.

Summer's Here and My Very Own School is IN!

Circle or group time: Children sit together and the coach initiates a conversation about topics such as the weather, the calendar, the seasons, a field trip, or an upcoming holiday. Sometimes she leads a discussion about a special theme or group project. The children learn concepts of time and space and gain new vocabulary words.

Free choice: Children choose from a variety of different activities available in the classroom: block building, puzzles, dress-up, water or sand play, drawing, or painting. They initiate their own play, either alone or with other children. They learn how to work independently, take turns, share, and play cooperatively with others.

Group activity: During this time, children may learn a song or dance. They may participate in making up a story, preparing a meal, planning a village, or working on a science or art project. They practice new skills, develop fine motor control, learn how to communicate their ideas and needs effectively, and how to work together as a team.

Snack: As they eat, preschoolers learn social and practical skills: how to set the table, to pass the juice and crackers, to carry on a conversation.

Outdoor play: Climbing, running, jumping, bouncing balls, and crawling through tunnels helps children develop large muscle control, motor coordination, and balance.

Clean-up: As they clear the table or put away the blocks, children learn how to plan, organize, and work with others.

Story time: Children gather together in a comfortable corner of the room to listen as the coach tells a story or reads from a book. They look at the illustrations and discuss them. The teacher asks questions about the story, helping children to learn to predict what will happen next. She encourages them to think about the characters and plot and to use new vocabulary from the story.

Toddler Autonomy

As you baby grows, he will most surely enter the realm of independence and desire a level of autonomy needed to continue to grow.

Your toddler has not yet acquired all the skills necessary to function independently, which creates a whole lotta frustration within this little being who believes he’s ready to take on the world.

While their favorite word may become “no”, yours should not. Using “no” excessively only takes away the power of the word and encourages your tot to use it as freely. Creating space in your home that is a 100% free zone enables them to have fun in a safe setting, while allowing you to relax knowing that you won’t need to intervene every moment. Allow your child to make some decisions, no matter how wacky.

If she really wants to wear her purple boots and old Halloween costume while going to the grocery store, setting the limit that it can be worn to the store but must be removed by dinner allows your child to taste independence without dominating you in the process.

Furthermore, allowing your child days to express her growing independence by wearing mommy’s shoes while helping set the table or holding the dog’s leash as you return your pet to the backyard satisfies some of their hunger to be big! Remember, you are doing a great job and their budding desire to become their own little person is a reflection of their growing maturity.

A great read is Michelle LaRowe's Nanny to the rescue! Enjoy.

Changing Newborn's Diaper: Essential Tips

You'd never guess that changing a baby's diaper could be a challenge until the day you change your first diaper. Baby wiggles and squiggles, you find the wipes are out of reach or you get a sweet shower from your newborn boy 'cause you didn't know to cover him up. Some babies do not like to be unclothed in the cool air and they cry with discomfort, others can't wait to get naked.

Here are a few essential tips if changing baby is a new skill for you.

To change your baby’s diaper:
• It’s best to wash your hands before changing your newborn’s diaper. Be sure to wash your hands with soap and water after each diaper change, too.
• Lay your baby on a clean surface. Take along a blanket or changing pad when you go out.
• Remove the dirty diaper.
• Use a washcloth dipped in clean, lukewarm water. Wash all the area on your baby that the diaper covers. Wipe from front to back to avoid infection.
• Every time you change a diaper, clean your baby’s umbilical cord. Use a cotton swab that you have dipped in rubbing alcohol. Squeeze it so that it is almost dry. Gently clean off the sticky stuff around the cord where it touches your baby’s tummy. The cord will fall off by itself in five to 10 days. Your baby may cry when you touch the wet swab to the cord. Be gentle.

Check with your doctor if your baby cries at other times when you touch the cord. Check with your doctor if the skin around the cord is red. If this advice is contrary to what your doctor has told you, do as your doctor says as every baby is different, your doctor knows you and your newborn best.

• When you put a clean diaper on your baby, fold the top to make the fit more secure. If you are using pins, put your hand between the pin and your baby’s skin. Do not let the diaper cover up the umbilical cord or belly button.

Newborns use about 10-12 diapers every day. Change them as soon as they are wet. This can prevent rashes. Have a place to put the soiled diapers and washcloths, best to wrap each soiled diaper separately in a baggie or plastic bag, this will control odor.

Remember, never take your hands off a newborn when changing them, safety first.

Your Baby's Reflexes

Instincts are powerful. Your baby is born with instinctive reflexes that assist in survival.

Here's a quick review of a few of your baby's reflexes, to help you marvel at your newborn.

• Moro or “startle” reflex: This occurs when your baby's head shifts position quickly. Or when her head falls backward. Or when your baby is startled by something loud. She will react by throwing out her arms and legs and extending her neck. Your baby will then quickly bring her arms together. She may cry when doing this. This reflex should go away after two months.
• Rooting reflex: This is how your baby hunts for her mother's breast. If you gently stroke the side of her cheek with your finger, she will turn her head toward your finger. This lasts for three to four months.
• Grasp reflex: Your baby will clench her fist around anything pressed into the palm of her hand. You can show this to a big brother or sister. Say, “The baby wants to hold on to your finger.” This reflex goes away at five to six months.
• Stepping reflex: If you hold a newborn baby upright under her arms with her feet on a hard surface, her feet will make a stepping action. This happens even though it is a long time before she is ready to stand or walk. This usually lasts a couple of months.

Ask your pediatrician if you have any questions about your baby's reflexes.

Live On The Bright Side In Your Relationship

Business is competitive, we all work hard, drive hard and live hard, BUT maybe it all doesn’t have to be this hard.

Having a successful career, successful relationships and an extraordinary life are complementary - All can be achieved. Get out of damage control and back into thriving relationships at work and at home with practical solutions that will change your life.

a. What Harvard says you can do to increase longevity and happiness
b. Three essential steps to successful relationships at work and home
c. The 5 Factor Makeover

Successful Relationships Lesson #1 – Live on the bright side.
Research shows that your viewpoint and attitude may impact your health, happiness and career success more than your genetics.

Successful Relationships Lesson #2– Choose your shoes. You choose what shoes you walk in, what path you take and who you take it with, be proactive not reactive and choose your shoes, don’t just wear any shoes someone offers you.

Successful Relationships Lesson #3– Learn how to push the STOP Button. Know when to stop yourself from making critical, demeaning, contemptuous and sarcastic comments. Edit yourself. People who avoid saying every critical thought when discussing touchy topics are consistently the happiest and most successful in their relationships.

Successful Relationships Lesson #4– Bored people are boring people.
If you aren’t sure what is interesting and intriguing about you, it’s time to find out. If you hear yourself say, I am tired of this job, life, relationship etc. it’s time to take charge, take a risk and make a change.

Successful Relationships Lesson #5– Forgiveness fosters health.
People often think that if they harbor anger it hurts the person they are angry with but anger only hurts you. People who let anger go and experience forgiveness experience less heart disease, anxiety and depression.

My Very Own School @ Home

Many of the families with whom I work wish for their children to:

a) improve in-school behavior
b) develop better every-day routines
c) spend valuable enrichment time at home this summer
d) enjoy arts, crafts, games and play that will enhance learning
e) develop a summer schedule that adds enrichment to free play

Give your children ages 3-7 a Head-Start in school next year with our My Very Own School program. Our Family Coach, Dr. Lynne Kenney, teaches you how to bring school structure, art centers, music centers, nutrition, cooking, phonics, math, social studies and science into your home to help your children improve school performance, academic enrichment and school behavior for next year. Bring the success of school home for your children with this unique enrichment program.

1. Creating a school center in which learning can take place.
2. Writing a daily school schedule for the child.
3. Developing a curriculum that can be used within the schedule.
4. Establishing learning and enrichment goals.
5. Incorporating, play, art, music, and cooking to meet enrichment goals.
6. Organizing and labeling all enrichment materials.
7. Creating an organized activity closet for all enrichment items.
8. Providing brief written summary of work product and achievement toward goals.

Templates, tools and your own curriculum resources provided. Email at www.lynnekenney.com me to learn more.

Spring Cleaning with Meryl Starr

Spring is here, finally. The days are longer and warmer and we are all looking forward to spending more time outside. Spring is a special time for me as its time for Spring Cleaning. For a Personal Organizer, Spring Cleaning is like Christmas, New Years and July 4th all wrapped up into one.

As I mention in the "To Do List" chapter of my book, The Personal Organizing Workbook, Spring is the perfect excuse to make a clean start. The following is a list of 10 easy ways to prepare of the season.

1) Scrub-a-dub-dub. It isn't called "spring cleaning" for nothing. Dust bunnies, cobwebs grime and dirt all have to go.

2) Glasswork. Wash your windows. Nothing brings in light like washing away that winter film.

3) Plant a Garden Now. Then, enjoy flowers, fresh herbs, and home-grown tomatoes this summer.

4) Research summer camps for the kids.

5) Make sure the air conditioner is up and running. Change the filter lately?

6) Cleaning Agents. Spring is the perfect time to get your carpets, rugs and upholstery cleaned by professionals.

7) Curtain Call. Replace the shower-curtain liner in your bathroom. Mold and mildew can build up and exacerbate allergies and asthma.

8) Keep a picnic basket and a blanket handy, so you can make the most of a sunny afternoon at a moment's notice.

9) Finish up those indoor projects you started and did not complete during the winter. Projects like painting your bedroom or organizing a box of photographs. Soon your attention will be outdoors and you will not revisit the indoor projects till October.

10) Waste Not. Don't forget to clean out your closets, drawers and cabinets. Mark two bins "keep" and "get rid of". Be cold, be heartless, be unforgiving. And don't forget to get a receipt when you donate your stuff to local charities.

I hope this list helps you to get the Spring Season off to an Organized start. In the meantime please look for me in April's issue of "Health Magazine" (page 118) on the newsstands now. In this article I tackle the subject of organizing your home office, most people's number one clutter zone.

Enjoy the warm weather,

All the best,

Meryl Starr
Personal Organizer
www.merylstarr.com

I was a really good mom before I had kids

I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids -- "I don't know how she does it!" is an oft-heard refrain about mothers today. Funnily enough, most moms agree—they have no idea how they get it done, or whether they even want the job. Trisha Ashworth and Amy Nobile spoke to mothers of every stripe—working, stay-at-home, part-time—and found a surprisingly similar trend in their interviews. After enthusing about her lucky life for twenty minutes, a mother would then break down and admit that her child's first word was "Shrek." As one mom put it, "Am I happy? The word that describes me best is challenged." Fresh from the front lines of modern motherhood comes a book that uncovers the guilty secrets of moms today . . . in their own words. I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids recognizes the craziness and offers real solutions, so that mothers can step out of the madness and learn to love motherhood as much as they love their kids.

The Family Schedule

A family schedule is a central component of establishing rhythm and routines in your family. Family schedules guide your child’s life to enhance predictability and mastery.

Do you have a family schedule? Do you know what happens in your family Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday?

It’s time to actually write your schedule out for all to see.

Start with a piece of paper or better yet, a piece of large cardboard. Draw out your family schedule. You might even go to a teacher's store and buy a school-sized schedule, they are so fun to mark up, write on and change over time.

Let’s begin with Monday, what does your day look like? Remember it's not the time that matters, it's the order of the activities, that's what establishes family rhythm.

• Time to wake-up, get dressed and go to school
• School-Time
• After-school Activity Time
• Homework-Time
• Dinner-Time
• Outdoor Play/Sports Time
• Reading-Time
• Bed-Time

Now for each day, write out your schedule.

Talk with your spouse and your kids about the family schedule. What does your schedule look like? Draw it out, hang it up and enjoy the structure and predictability it provides.

Spoiling Your Children

Spoiling your children is about avoiding the hard work of setting limits and boundaries. Listen in...

Your Family Mission: Secret #1 Raising Successful Children

We all want to raise happy successful children. But how do you go about it? You read books, watch videos, and talk with friends. But what is your plan? Do you have
a plan? We all spend much time thinking about and planning for the birth of our children but what is the plan for raising our children?

Applying principles that have been practiced in business by experts such as Michael Gerber, Stephen Covey and Dan Sullivan is a fine place to start.

If you have ever read First Things First by Stephen Covey or The Personal Organizing Workbook by Meryl Starr, you are likely well on your way to planning for and living in a successful family.

Here are five secrets from The Family Coach Playbook to begin developing your plan to raise successful children in a happy home.

Secret 1: Establish your family mission statement. That’s’ right. Every family needs one but few families have a written mission statement. Your family mission statement clarifies the kind of family you live in. Every family has a reason for being. You are most likely to raise successful children if you know exactly what your family mission is.

Let’s reflect on your mission for a moment.

• Do you have a mission?
• Were you raised in a family with a mission?
• When you reflect back, if your family mission was undefined, define it.
• What did your family stand for?
• What messages were communicated to you about what you did, how you did it and why you did it?

Take the time to talk with your spouse and your children about the kind of family you are and the kind of family you want to be.

• Why does your family exist?
• What kind of family do you want to be?
• What do you really care about?
• What really matters to you?

As parents, when you think about the kind of family you want to raise, why do you feel this way?

• Do you want to raise children who are respectful? Why?
• Do you want to raise children who value their education? Why?
• Do you want to live in a happy home? Why?
• Do you want to live in a peaceful home? Why?
• Do you want to live in an organized home? Why?

Take everyone’s viewpoint into consideration. Everyone’s original voice makes a valuable contribution to who you become as a family. Whether your children are ages 4, 9 or 15, talk with your children about what kind of family they want to be raised in.

Ask questions of your children to begin the dialogue:

• What kind of family do you want to live in?
• What kind of family do you want us to be?
• What kinds of activities do you want to do as a family?
• When your friends come over to play, what do you want them to see?
• How can we make our home a place your friends want to come to?
• What do you see in your friend’s homes that you wish we had or did here?
• How will our choices at home affect our choices at school?
• How will our choices at home affect our choices at dance class, chess club or on the soccer field?

Your family mission is the foundation of your family.

Take out a piece of paper, a large piece of cardboard or a marker board and draw out what matters to everyone. Let your children draw on it, scribble notes, draw pictures, make a model of your family home and design the kind of family you want to live in. This allows you to define your life rather than be lead by it.

When it comes time to write your mission statement down, use words, pictures, maps and notations. Then synthesize your family notes into one paragraph.

We are the kind of family who…

Here are a few examples written by real families like yours:

“The mission of our family is to provide a home environment that encourages honesty, fairness, respect and love. We work together to ensure that each member of our family feels important and has the support and the tools they need to reach their higher goals.”

“We reach out to others to promote respect for all people in our daily life.”
“We are a family that regards education as the foundation of success. Having reached our educational goals we will give back to others in order to share our success.”

Enjoy the process. Celebrate the discussion. Then post your family mission for all to see. Communicate often about the kind of family you are and how you behave reflects upon who you are as a family.

When family members exhibit behaviors that are contrary to your mission, gently remind them of the kind of family you are.

“James, you took your sister’s iPod without asking. In our family we respect one another’s property. How can you use her iPod and show your sister respect at the same time?”

“Sarah, you ignored your mom when she asked you to finish your homework. In our family we respect one another’s words, let’s try that again, in a way that shows your mom that you respect her request.”

In the next piece on Five Secrets To Raising Successful Children: The Family Coach Way, we will review Secret 2 - Establish your family values. So check back soon.

Read, Read, Read Read more...with your children

Summer is approaching and you will spend hours and hours playing with your children. You'll drive them to playdates, take them to the pool, play in the sprinklers and make memories every day. This Summer, give your children a head up in school, read with them every day. Research shows that children who read with their parents do much better in school than children for whom reading is not a valued family activity.

After you have read a few pages or completed a book (depending on your child's attention span) extend the activity by talking about, drawing about or acting about the book, its characters and themes. Reading doesn't have to be just about the printed word, it is about how you bring the story to life!

Here are some of the top 25 books for children. Enjoy!

Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White
Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak
The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein
Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss
Good Night Moon by Margaret Wise Brown
I Love You Forever by Robert N. Munsch
Because of Winn Dixie by Kate DiCamillo
Oh! The Places You Will Go by Dr. Seuss
The Little House by Virginia Lee Burton
The Polar Express by Chris Van Allsburg
Skippyjon Jones by Judy Schachner
Thank You Mr. Falker by Patricia Polacco
The Cat In The Hat by Dr. Seuss
The Lorax by Dr. Seuss
The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane by Kate DiCamillo
The Mitten by Jan Brett
Crunching Carrots, Not Candy by Judy Slack
Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus by Mo Willlems
Harry Potter Series by J.K. Rowling
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst
Are You My Mother? by P.D. Eastman
Corduroy by Don Freeman
Lilly's Purple Plastic Purse by Kevin Henkes
Stellaluna by Janell Cannon

For more books visit http://www.nea.org/readacross/resources/catalist.html.

My Very Own School @ Home

Give your children a Head-Start in school next year with our My Very Own School program. The Family Coach, Dr. Lynne Kenney, teaches you how to bring school structure, art centers, music centers, nutrition, cooking, phonics, math, social studies and science into your home to help your children improve school performance, academic enrichment and school behavior for next year. Bring the success of school home for your children with this unique enrichment program.

Creating A Personalized Program: Day 1

1. Evaluate children's current enrichment needs.
2. Develop personalized curriculum.
3. Establish learning and enrichment goals.
4. Plan for center development.
5. Determine learning templates, curriculum activities and time-frames.

Setting Up The Program: Day 2

1. Develop learning centers.
2. Create activity closets.
3. Write daily schedule.
4. Implement My Very Own School schedule and activities.
5. Choose parent, teacher or coach.
6. Finalize assessment and feedback forms.

Your family can use the My Very Own School Schedule to help organize each summer day to help the days run smoothly or you can implement My Very Own School as an activity in your home 4-8 hours per week. Either way, your children will love the activities, they'll feel confident about learning and you'll enjoy the experiences and memories you share.