Spirit Menders

Children are born with an incredible spirit. Everything is new, fascinating and thought provoking. As parents, it should be our goal to keep this spirit alive and fresh for as long as possible. Unfortunately, we often unwittingly do things that squash the spirit in our children. Here are some common spirit breakers and some spirit menders. See if you’re guilty of doing things that can break the spirit. Then try some of these spirit menders to help get you back on track.

Spirit Breakers

• Squashing Dreams – Your little boy tells you that when he grows up he wants to be an astronaut and fly to outer space. Trying to instill some reason in him, you inform him of how difficult it is to be an astronaut; how smart he’ll have to be, how much education it requires, etc.

• Belittling Talent – Your daughter is great at soccer, but her grades are not as good as you’d like them to be. When she acts proud of scoring the winning goal, you say, “it would be far more impressive if you got an A in math”.

• Humiliation – Parents sometimes resort to embarrassing their child in order to get them to change behavior. “See, son, little Johnny doesn’t have accidents in his pants, and he’s your age.” Not only is this tactic ineffective; it breaks the spirit.

• Brushing off what your child thinks is fascinating – Children have a tendency to get somewhat obsessed with things. Maybe it annoys you that your son spends hours watching the stars through his telescope. However, if you give him the impression that being fascinated with the stars is silly, he may become ashamed of his interests and be afraid to pursue the things that really matter to him.

Spirit Menders

• Having a curious mind – If you show interest in how things work, and share this interest with your child, you fuel their natural curiosity and interest.

• Being involved in what they like – Your children have activities that bring them joy, join in those activities with them! Get off the couch and participate!

• Show that you’re proud – Be proud of whatever they accomplish – and let them know it. You can never love them too much and you can never tell them too many times that you’re proud of their accomplishments.

• Listen to them - Your children have fascinating original voices listen to their likes, dislikes, stories and experiences.

Take a deep breath and begin to be present, loving and compassionate today. It's not too late to mend your child's spirit.